I'm jealous of your bromance
No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
You're just mad at the fact that I want to be a car alarm.
He painted his chest for the game... I just fucked an exclamation point.
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
'Well you know, stuff happens' isn't really an excuse for sticking a cheeto in my ear
It's probably because the lack of alcohol in your stomach. Alcohol kills bacteria. I am a doctor. Trust me
So we were in bed when his brother walks in, walks over to me, fist bumps me and says he just wanted to say hi, then leaves...so random lmao
I'm in his bed with no pants on and he's just eating a sloppy joe
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
EVERYBODY CALM YOUR SHIT
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
Things change once you put a ring on it. 5 years ago if I had morning wood she would have gone nympho on that. Now I am just lucky if she touches it rolling when we sleep.
Randomize
