Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
1 month til my stepdad becomes a u.s. citizen, so if you want to get in on the divorce pool its your last chance, $5 a square.
on the list of things i learned today that are not stripper poles: ex-boyfriends, table legs, and police officers.
Man, I thought my dick was gonna fall off.
Dude, I didn't even think they made slap bracelets anymore. You okay?
SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow
Playing nyquil pong with a cat again
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
WHY WOULD YOU SWIPE RIGHT???!!!!!
The same reason I ordered and ate almost an entire pizza last night
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.
What did you give up for lent?
Diet and excersize. And I'm never going back...
Randomize
