called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
Am I allowed to make my facebook status "loves farting in chairs"? I think it would shock every boy that I am friends with.
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
Just had a 40 min argument about how many celebrity guest appearances on Sesame Street were court ordered for DUIs.
Vague recollection of me ripping your shirt off at the bar... I hope I asked first, otherwise that's real rude.
You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.
Don't use or open the microwave. It's full of smoke. Buying a new one tomorrow, will explain.
It's not safe here. I had urgent and violent diarrhea last night, and I got blackout drunk. Please don't come over.
Randomize