She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
You sprayed lemon pledge on your crotch because it was "dusty"
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
Caught my drug dealer jacking off. I think this is a new step in our relationship
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
i got her number while she was sitting next to her boyfriend. her actual number. i might be a superhero
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
Come make me food. I feel like if I go in the kitchen I will just get Gin.. and pass out in there.
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
There is a man in my bed with "new zealand" tattooed on his back. Wtf happened last night?
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
I had perfectly good intentions but my penis had other ideas and now I need a place to crash what do you say
Randomize
