Most fantastic sex ever until her Doberman took an interest in what we were doing. There was nothing more terrifying then feeling warm dog breath on my ballsack.
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
Some dude gave me a questioning look as I came out of the women's toilet. I just responded 'blowjob' and he understood, then shook my hand.
I slept with a married guy last night and then broke my toe on the doorframe on the way out. I've never seen karma work so fast.
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
How do you say "I'm sorry I beat you up while cumming" in German?
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
There is a video recording of my birth. I have seen it. It is terrifying.
FYI my mom is sending thanksgiving "samples" of her fancy pot stash for us this weekend. I bring the BEST family leftovers.
WHY IS THERE A FUCKING DILDO IN PLACE OF MY GEAR SHIFTER IN MY CAR?
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
I need to find a more reliable booty-call so I can start dating people and take it slow.
The couple in the apartment next to mine are both opera singers. I’m never sure if I’m hearing them banging or doing vocal warm-ups.
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
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