shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
it's like heaven, but drunker
Couldn't see or hear that well because she hit me on the back of the head with a bat. That is my excuse. Also the gin.
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
Even when you're down just know that I will always be the one to pour alcohol into your asshole when you're on probation
His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
Han Solo would be ashamed of me.
So the guy I hooked up with during welcome week just tried to booty call me from across the lecture hall at 9am. I don't think he gets how this works...
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
I woke up with my winter coat on, next to a polaroid of me, her and a swan...so no I don't remember our conversation.
Randomize
