When she said "surprise me" I'm positive she didn't mean "bang my roommate"
Prob not but she was surprised
I didn't slap you in the face. TEQUILA slapped you with my hand...
Buhtt sex?
Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
Sitting here wishing there were men in my life.
me too. too bad ive decided to fill that hole with cookie dough, closing the door to future men one fat cell at a time.
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
It would be like if I said I had the cure for cancer and my explanation was I like turtles.
And then god smiled down upon me and he said let there be hangover food and let it be Wendy's
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
HE CHOSE A RESTAURANT AND MADE A FUCKING RESERVATION. I AM SHOOK
last night I used snow as a chaser
I got a pots and pans set and a vibrator. Merry Crisis.
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
Randomize
