like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
I just Organized my jello shots by their colors in my mini fridge for the rest of the week. I'm going places in life.
I get way too drunk to be trusted with family heirlooms
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
I'm currently braless eating the balls of the penis cake and drinking warm champagne. I'm 3 cats away from crazy at this point
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
just woke up on my patio with a mouse eating cheetos off mys chest. youre all assholes.
The girl who comes up after me always strips to Lana Del Rey. I didn't think working in a strip club could be any more depressing.
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
I'm officially disproving the fact that a hoe never gets cold bc this hoe is COLD.
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
Yah. I'm gonna lay you down and feed you grapes, except I'm gonna replace grapes for my balls
She just. Cock slapped me. With string cheese.
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
Randomize
