maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
She made fun of how I walked so I announced to her boyfriend that I have cum on her face before.
he wanted me to dress up like someone from lord of the rings. I dumped him.
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
he said he would handcuff me to his penis. thats not even possible. i want to go home.
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
I found him in bed on a pullout couch with another dude. He had two empty puke buckets and his empty bottle of jagermeister right by his head.
The waitress asked if you wanted white or brown, and you said "Isn't it all the same color when it's toasted?". She stared at you for about 20 seconds before she decided that you weren't fucking with her.
The molly dropped while I was taking a shit. Do you have any idea how scary that is?
That does not seem like timing
I need rollerblades now
Rollerblades pick up bitches
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
I'm on someone's yacht. I don't know who. But I'm on it. There's a guy passed out in a kilt holding bagpipes. Help.
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