My nipple is on Facebook.
Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
I'm glad the dog doesn't judge me for doing leftover lines and watching George of the Jungle at 10 am
Why the fuck did you text me at 4 in the morning telling me not to have sex with the bird?
Oh shit. There are penis maracas
After all the hair products he's stolen from me, he better fucking be gay.
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
Its that time in the evening when I've had a few cocktails and wish you'd make a video about the packers and Jack Daniels.
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
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