And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
you realize that if you hadn't mouthed "we're getting laid tonight", i wouldn't have woken up with your ex this morning. just sayin
Apparently you get kicked out of gay bars if they catch you putting the entire free condom bowl in your purse.
im eating mac and cheese with a makeup brush. there is wayyyyy too much wrong with this night.
I swear 95% of pictures on my phone are from drunken nights I don't remember with me doing a peace sign alone in somebody's bedroom.
Ughhh I can't remember the last time "time fell back or springed forward" and I wasn't at the bar to argue about it :(
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
Your favorite boobs are sending you seasons greetings
I can't trust your balls anymore.
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
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