Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
You know you stopped at a liquor store to prepare for a 12-year-old's birthday party, right?
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
Just realized I lost my social security card...maybe someone else will do something with my life
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
Golf group in front of us has 2 hooker caddies. One guy was getting a lap dance as he waited to tee off. Only in vegas.
I woke up with the Dorothy costume at my ankles, both sparkly red shoes on, and clutching ToTo....we're not in Kansas anymore, dude
So, when I got arrested, they fingerprinted me. I'm getting my nails done right now and I'm pretty sure he's filing off my prints. Worth the $30.
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
Quick question—how good are you at digging holes? I mean, besides the one you've dug for yourself. asking for a friend
and idk now I have nine bags of lettuce in my fridge
This is very awkward but where is my dildo, Mom
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