There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
I have carpet burn on my ass, I'm rethinking my decisions last night.
I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
I'm on the bus going to class. And a cop just rolled by and I got nervous because I didn't have my seatbelt on. I have to stop smoking so much weed.
I woke up wearing a cow costume. I'm not even gonna try to recall what happened last night.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
Tell nick i'm sorry for throwing a block of cheese at him last night
All I did was present the dick. You did the work. That's like thanking the pencil for a test you got an A on.
I don't understand how she could dump me AFTER we had shower sex. I'm fucking great at shower sex
We got Pizza Hut & Papa Johns, delivered within seconds of each other, and both delivery people did a shot. I was put on Earth for this moment.
I CAN'T FUCK HIM OUTSIDE. THAT'S FOR PEASANTS. HE'S TOO FAMOUS FOR THAT.
It was a blind-side dick pic.
At 3:00am my whole house started smelling like cooking meat. I have no idea why she thought it was a good idea to crock-pot a WHOLE turkey that early in the morning.
I just Spray tanned myself while high as fuck its either going to look like a work of art or terrible graffiti
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