You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
I owe all of my success to double stuf oreos and weed.
We should never set our expectations higher than pizza bagels cause then our night is bound to get better
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
OMG stoned with flashing lights behind me, I was freaking out until I realized I wasn't driving my couch
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
that freshman chick we always see on the weekends walked into art class wearing a jaegermeister shirt and holding a monster, which she proceeded to shotgun with a pair of scissors. It sickens me to know I will never achieve her level
It was the best of bangs; it was the worst of bangs.
LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
I also have to vacuum the broken noodles out of my suitcase...
Sooooooo this guy just asked me if I'd be interested in a threesome... I'm considering bc I would get to hang out with his dog afterwards.
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
Randomize
