Got a toothbrush?
And then a tiny penis fell out of my purse
my mom noticed the "toothpaste" stain on my tshirt...she repeatedly attempted to get it off by licking her thumb and rubbing it. See Jenn it obviously doesnt taste that bad...
Shotgunned a beer while taking a bath.
Beer coozy in the gym. Don't judge me.
I moved my bed to the living room so when a girl walks in she has to decide right away if shes in or out
I literally was just rolling on the ground and said to her 'this is what dying looks like'
I just instagramed a picture of an ostrich in case you were wondering what I did with my night
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
I don't think I'm gonna survive today. I don't remember how to walk. I must crawl 6 blocks to my bed.
You stopped loving me for a minute.
You sent me "Is nap," I don't think that really counts as a conversation starter.
Terrible idea I love it
I woke up and found that i was using my computer as a pillow. i had 53 pages of random letters on Microsoft word
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
Randomize