he just tried to lick my eyebrow. thats the deal breaker.
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
you're surprised the chick that fucked you for a free cup has herpes. i don't feel bad for you.
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
Ummm so I'm at the hospital and just heard some guy get tazed......twice.
what are you going as for halloween?
drunk, naked, & emotionally unstable
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
He told me he felt the only proper thing to do was fuck me to the top of the corporate ladder
How do I un-spend everything I bought last night? Seriously...was a penis shaped piñata and enough tequila to fill my bathtub really that necessary?
At least you can say you've literally dumped money down the drain
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
Randomize
