White coat. Heels.
Espresso. Can't sleep. Love puppies
i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
Until then we have the self affirmation from retweets and nights alone with pizza..
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
My penis just literally said "Yaaaaaay!!!" It's the first time it's spoken out loud. Before this we could only communicate through rudimentary sign language
The two girls sitting next to me are asking siri "Like, uh, how do you know my name?". Do I fuck with them or fuck them?
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
I asked him to explain what he meant by "hooking up" in paragraph form
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
I am convinced you could sleep through the apocalypse and only wake up because youre hungry & want Dominoes
Oh btw, ur tongue should count as a second cock it's that good
Randomize
