dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
Soo I have a handle of 100 proof captain, cupcakes, and nothing to get up for in the morning.. This blizzard is shaping up to be a great night.
I was to drunk to drive all the way up there, so we just had rough phone sex instead
i think the bruises are from the grocery store. on separate occasions. i've been spending a lot of time drunk at the market lately.
i have a vague recollection of being in the parking deck around 4 this morning, and on monday morning i was naked on the roof.
that would mean it's on tape
Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
Getting drunk and falling down, isnt the best way to describe your hobbies, to your new co-workers.
In other news, people don't judge you when you buy a vibrator if you buy a funny birthday card and bag with it. I learned that this weekend.
I don't know, I think it's at least a minor achievement when you can light up with the guy who took your virginity and act like you didn't have and incredibly awkward sexual experience together
I'm taking a shower and i'm gonna bring my pocketknife with me
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
Randomize
