i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
She bit a glass in half.
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
I just want to point out that nothing makes my hickie/hangover more obvious than sleeping in a scarf and sunglasses. nothing.
after i talked him through a bulleted list of why we couldn't have sex he just said "but it would be fun...."
I refuse to have sex with you and your eBay condoms.
He called it restless penis syndrome. I call it cheating.
Want to get high and go thrifting? I'm trying to succeed making my dorm look like a deranged Applebees.
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
I need to reevaluate my stance on weekday hangovers...
If Dr Phil has taught me anything about myself, it’s that I can seriously relate to those women who fake their pregnancies.
like, there were so many other better not terrible choices you could have made, so i'm honestly baffled that you managed to fuck up that bad
Randomize
