The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
Come in. Grab a controller and a beer. We've got some Madden to beat.
You're the best girlfriend ever.
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
and I'm going to name my autobiography "blow jobs with enthusiasm are the best"
I'm naming my autobiography "Reasons Not to Date Girls From Texas."
It's not my fault I help girls realize they're lesbians.
i'm not accepting baked goods from anyone for awhile. especially after the stalker pie.
Oh you know, sitting here in my bathing suit watching antiques road show and petting the cat. Just the usual
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
Please don't finger me like a jackhammer. I'm a woman not a construction site.
You "drove" the computer chair around the party for a good fifteen minutes. you would crash into things, freak out, and yell for an ambulance.
I am that special "drink water and be grateful I'm alive" kind of hungover
I wish i didn't black out tuesday so i could have cherished our moment together
Throwing up together is NOT a cherishable moment...
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