Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
Watching dad use Doritos to illustrate exactly where to locate the clitoris. How's your family christmas going?
i feel like pizza bites are my only friend right now
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
Sorry I dragged you across a parking lot
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
he can get married early and ruin his life but he sure as hell isn't ruining mine with a shitty bachelor party
I just got dropped off by that cop that pulled you over. Best sex ever! Consider that $140 ticket my birthday present.
You know you threw a brownie at my head last night. And said you did it to defend the turtles honer....
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
So what's it like to be pregnant?
It feels like I'm hungover and when I was drunk I was kicked off a mechanical bull and then trampled.
I was not drunk enough for that final.
Randomize
