i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
i may or may not have puked on your loofa in the shower.
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
I had a great time except for the part where you called another guy, told him you were in a cab - not on a date - and that you'd meet him at a bar in 15 minutes. but besides that it was awesome. Next time capping you at two glasses of wine
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
Would you please stop exposing your tits on my couch?
Fuck you, my tits are fabulous
I have to take tonight off from shenanigans. My liver is planning a coup
And here I thought that was one nut sack too many
went out to hit golf balls, ended up doing splits at the bar. you're a bad influence.
Shut up. I hate you. We're doing shots tomorrow. Fuck the consequences.
Listen, yo... we need to have a serious conversation about this Dollar Store toilet paper. Because if I’m going to finger someone’s ass, it’s not going to be my own.
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