Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
i woke up with a wedding ring drawn on my finger...if this was vegas id be worried
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
He bought me a oreo ice cream cake with "thanks for not calling the cops!" written in icing. If that doesn't sum up winter break, I don't know what does.
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
So then you challenged the bartender to an arm wrestling contest for a free bottle of vodka
Sweet. Did I win?
Youre hungover arent you?
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
Oooo. Can we pretend to be Amanda Bynes?
She bought wigs like Disney princesses. I want to be her.
So I just realized I have three bananas, seven condoms, three lube packets, three tampons, and a shot glass in my bag but no pen #modelstudent
I almost forgot to feel shameful, if that answers your question.
For the record you're an amazing lay and you have great taste in breakfast sandwiches
FYI, his "son" is a Chihuahua.
I don't blame you. I made YouTube videos of me singing Rent songs then slept with a married couple. Fucking tequila.
I just bought a bottle of dried bees on Etsy. I am the wrong person to talk you out of this.
Randomize
