so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA?
I decided to name her "day after thanksgiving" because I am sure I just got someone elses leftovers.
She is banging on the liquor store door begging them to let her come in.
By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
omg. i wish i could describe to you the number of things that were just in my vagina. i feel like i got gangbanged by construction workers.
U know that drunk state, where at 930 the next morning your sitting in a bath in ur bathing suit trying to sober up...yeah. That's where i am..
he was extremely fucked up- he thought my sports bra was his boxers. even when his leg wouldnt fit. at least whiskey dick wasnt a problem
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
You have set the bar insurmountably high with apple pie and buttsex.
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
This is my life. Enjoy the view
Not sure what time I'll be home. I'm currently topless and the damn stripper won't give me my clothes back
Who put my cat in the fridge?
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
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