What happened last night?
You soiled yourself again and told everybody that you'd given birth.
She had to get her inhaler in the middle of fucking...but she kept it in.
I just worked out and used handles of vodka as weights. Whoever said alcoholism is detrimental to you health obviously has no fucking idea.
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
And the funny thing is when I went to the kitchen this morning, all 4 pizzas were still there in their boxes, untouched. My question to you is: what were we eating last night?
I just won a riveting game of "who can drink the most vodka out of a hollowed out watermelon". Fucking New Yorkers.
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
This lady gave me four cups to go along with my gallon of daiquiri. Silly girl, all I need is a straw.
Woke up in the ER with a nurse holding my tongue together inside of my mouth and a shattered jaw, the last thing I remember is opening the 151, care to fill me in?
He wanted me to choke him with my feet. So now I feel obligated to start writing my memoir
That portion can talk about stepping out of your comfort zone and how it can potentially kill people
He was standing in the living room wearing a Donald Trump wig and looking very disappointed
Apparently 'ewww' is not the correct response to him saying he has to go to a funeral while I'm there.
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