you wouldn't even come home last night... Dead to me
So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
You should have seen the look on the cashiers face when I was buying steel reserve with a suit on.
i just heard a guy call his kid "Google" in a way that leads me to believe that's his name. this day couldn't get worse.
But I love Penises too much to give up on them. My phone capitalized Penises. It's like it knows I respect them
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
I was talking to another guy at the bar last night and all of a sudden a flying piece of Sausage lands on my boobs. Then I hear my boyfriend yell, "just marking my territory."
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
Every time you visit for the weekend I end up having to bleach my entire house after.
forgot to tell you your neighbor walked out of her house this morning just as I was leaving shirtless
We inadvertently arrived at the strip club on Bear Night. The dancers all look like young Santa Claus and there's a buffet....
I shit myself and fell down the stairs and I’m still finding shit In those pants.
Randomize
