It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
I wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commercials.
I'm drinking vodka out of a coffee pot. and i'm not even mad about it
When I look at old family photos I know how jessica simpson feels when she watches dukes of hazzard
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
I told him to pick up the beer can he threw in front of the police station. So he gets out chugs whatever's left and throws it back and says ok let's go.
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
I feel like a drive thru vagina
I also just stashed a half dozen bobby pins in my bra.... So when you take it off later, consider yourself warned
Tbh the only thing I was fully concerned about from the dream was what type of fucked up parallel universe doesn't have Coca-Cola
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
Randomize
