I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
enterprise is going to pick me up, im too high for this
i crunched every chip from the dorito bag and poured it in the vase. never again will i have to deal with cool ranch fingers.
I just sat there and watched paula deen's face melt for an hour.
Just lifeguarded a kid's party hungover so I could afford to go out drinking tonight. Circle of life shit goin on here.
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
Ya. I wonder how much being a beard for a major league baseball player pays. This could be a lucrative arrangement...
just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
We 6 way cheers-ed with French fries last night, hammered, in the booth.
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
I wish I could be at this cabin banging all these old dads
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
My mom heard me having sex with my boyfriend but thought it was the neighbors. She commented on how quick it was. I just nodded and changed the subject
You'd think that a rotation of two 30 year old men could keep me satisfied... WHY ISN'T THERE A MAN THAT CAN KEEP UP WITH MY HEALTHY SEXUAL APPETITE?!
Randomize
