Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
His facebook status is an owl city song. I'm so glad i didn't end up fucking him.
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
Yes I was being legit. That's the only plant I want in my house. A growing penis.
Hey wes just called me saying he was asleep outside by the pond at my apt complex
You know Im horny if Im walking around in my lingerie and sex robe. It's my field of dreams mentality. If I wear it, he will come.
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
I have to deal with three things I do not like this weekend. Pooping in toilets that are not mine. Air mattresses. Not beating off in the shower.
she cut her forehead open playing a drunken game of pin the tail on the donkey and now she's having a panic attack.
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
Oooo. Can we pretend to be Amanda Bynes?
She bought wigs like Disney princesses. I want to be her.
There's a ton of international students in my suite and I'm just sitting in this chair with no pants on eating frosted flakes
Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
Then you're three pancakes deep in regret.
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
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