so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
Just got attacked by a family of raccoons, I have the worst luck.
He made me eat donuts off his dick. donuts, jen. DONUTS.
Just remember, if we get caught, you're deaf and I don't speak English.
If you saw or spoke to me yesterday can you message me. Trying to make a timeline of the day I was too drunk to remember
I just saw a guy in a hazmat suit riding a tractor.
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
I walked into your room and you were wearing party beads, a foam finger, and reading the dictionary. Good night?
I have had my dick inside of entirely too many people at this wedding in order for me to be the groom. Please give me a swift kick in the dick to wake me up from this nightmare
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
What is the best medium with which to say, "Happy Birthday, I'm having your abortion"... Cake? Card?
Randomize
