Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
How do you jack off and text at the same time?
On my iPhone they have an app for that
Sex on a kitchen table is not as amazing as they make is seem in the movies.
she said "can't you just pull out and cum on my face? I hate scooping jizz out of my vag".
I'm assuming you texted me by mistake. you're not jizzing in or on me again, thanks for playing, douchebag.
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
My vagina has become a graveyard for my brother's friendships...
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
He slow fucked me. Doggy style. On a porch. You never slow fuck doggy style. Its a law. A LAW.
$150 bar tab covered by these tits. That's now the going rate. Keeping my bra on during sex unless i see the Benjamins.
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
So are you actually going to come fuck me in the ass this weekend, or was that just you being drunk in a kilt?
Taylor Swift needs more songs about threesomes. I'm not sure she gets me anymore.
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
Randomize
