She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
This fat girl in front of me just got on the bus to go 2 blocks. Do you think she ever wonders why shes fat?
Too tired to do the dishes so I made mac and cheese in a teapot. There's still some left if you want some...
he aplogized for the shitty sex and called me "ma'am" when he did it. And he wants redemption sex. Gah I love southern gentlemen.
Was waiting for the adderal to kick in then realized I had been brushing my teeth for eighteen minuites
I'm functioning at the level of a challenged walrus.
You were dancing around the clubbing yelling "best wingman ever" and raising your cast in the air
soo how bad was i last night?
licking sour cream off of the table at pancheros bad.
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
Youre attempt to ruin my night by putting Date Rape by Sublime on my sex playlist failed. She was into it.
I just had the stunning realization that I lost my virginity in a bunk bed.
This is what my life has come to. Like, I may or may not have just stolen pizza from the guy I just hooked up with's fridge when I left...
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
It's like I'm getting a welcome home parade with sex!
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