Laying in bed naked with the guy I just fucked, talking to his WIFE who's sitting across from us like we're having a fucking tea party. This is interesting.
Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
So stoned I forgot I was masturbating and went to go get a cookie.
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
i can't believe you were mixing vodka with green tea last night and enjoying it.
i should bottle and sell it. my slogan could be "green tea vodka. antioxidating while intoxiacting. your liver will thank you. "
I swear to God, I just heard my guardian angel tell us to stop. I think we should listen.
I'm not drinking cause I'm like 4 vodkas away from a boom box and Peter Gabriel.
I gotta say, I do way better with the ladies than I do the men. So if it turns out being gay is a choice, then I'm going to go ahead and choose it.
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
We kept having to tell you that you couldn't just sit wherever you wanted at Walmart. Sitting in the middle of the raw meat section was unacceptable and children were staring at you.
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
Slept in and having coffee. No sounds of whipping and no veiny dildos next to me. This is good. How's your mornin?
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
Randomize
