hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
i just saw a guiness commercial where the guiness was on the verge of spilling the whole time. i was on the edge of my seat scared shitless. im an alcoholic.
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
im sorry, I just can't fuck a guy who can't receive picture messages
Just to circumvent as much mood-killing as possible, you are allowed a small amount of laughter at my pubic hair. Too much and I revoke your vagina privileges until you can get your shit together.
You rolled around on the floor, yelled about being a "half-zombie" and bit that guy on the leg who was hitting on me.
The salesman at the smoke shop just told me my hair is glorious...
I'm closer to stabbing a fork in my neck than finishing this resume.
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
He had a drawn-on fu manchu and now my vagina has one too.
You kept yelling "NO CAPES" at me for no apparent reason
Don't do it. It's 9 am on a Monday morning and I'm hungover. I can't deal with tears right now.
When campus security rolled up he stole their car and drove it like 100 feet. Then he walked up and gave back the keys because it was a hyundai.
Is it totally acceptable to fuck a co-worker even though we don't speak the same language?
Why do you even have to ask me that question
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