just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
dude...I wrote 15 jersey shore quotes on her body. she is going to do the walk of shame with snookie on her forehead.
no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
Getting too drunk for the hot dog vendor to serve me is possibly a sign of an alcohol problem. I threw up in the sewer grates next to his stand
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
Just traded the drive-through guy at BK a Dos Equis for a Hershey pie before noon... win?
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
THERE IS A WINE CUBE IN MY ASS THIS IS NOT GOING AS PLANNED
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
Oh also we fucked while one of the old Rudolph movies was playing on tv so it was festive
While strippers were eating ones out of my boobs, several sources claimed trump shared classified info with the russians. We should get hammered on Mondays more often, bitch.
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
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