Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
Everyone makes mistakes, yours just means you will forever be known as the chick that tried to steal a cheese plate from the funeral.
somehow, even strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA can't understand why he'd choose her over me
maybe it's because you talk to strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
Decided I'm going to wear a shirt that says "I'm sorry" whenever we go back to that fraternity
I want to show up to tomorrow's study group looking like I got hit by a train. A train made of dicks.
Dude...are you really going to start sexting during our friend's memorial service?
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
I dunno that I'd be trusting enough of junkyard tequila to drink it.
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
Grandma said I got a good handjob. I think she meant manicure.
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