today's thought: if you're naming your fb album "wEdDiNg dAy!!!!!!" you're too young to get married
i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
She's trying to figure out what kind of dinosaur I am... Yay codeine.
so the x-ray technician didnt buy my story of falling off a curb. she said a fall of that height couldnt snap the bone that way. bitch called me a drunken idiot too. if she wasnt so hot i'd be angry
Last time we talked he was trying to sext me but he was including pictures of fruit
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
I take pride in being a married 31 year old who sleeps on her best friend's bathroom floor from time to time.
I figured working in my office on the 34th floor I'd be safe railing xanax off my desk. Of course, I snort it just in time for the window washer guy to give me a thumbs up.
All I remember is sitting on your kitchen floor and playing with a banana like it was a viking ship.
Well there's a microwave in my yard now too. I fucking Bruce/Caitlyn Jennered decathloned that bitch.
She started throwing ice at me and started yelling, "Holy water bitches! This is an exorcism!"
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
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