Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
this is like black Friday for my dealer. I'm literally standing in line.
positive spin of the day: since my nose is blocked from allergies cleaning the puke this morning was much easier
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
well when mom kept referring to my "black hole of a vagina" and how i devoured all the nuts at the party like i was a pro, i figured my stay was up.
Don't judge me. If you're going to fall off a bed you might as well do it gracefully into a bag full of beer.
by the end of the night two people were passed out at the table, three on the couches, and one in the bathroom. it looked like someone pumped sleeping gas into the middle of a dinner party.
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
Dude, he wouldn't have sex with me during halftime cause we were rooting for different teams and that would be "bad juju", I had to settle for 69.
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
How are you feeling this morning?
Well, I just found day old puke in my bra, so I've been better.
I just shaved my legs via the sink as to not wake my parents up because I know I'll be having marathon sex tomorrow after my certification exam... so this is life after college.
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