I'm not a real person
I'm sorry, everyone knows that
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
She put baby oil on her toes and i am not legally allowed to talk about what happened
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
i've learned that i'm good at stealing things. like live cats.
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
I think that's why god made me a woman. Bc it's harder to slap people in the face with a vagina.
I was standing in my mom's kitchen in only my neon green thong, eating pizza over the garbage can, and sobbing while he was yelling at me.
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
What's the best day of the week to potentially find out you're pregnant with your ex's baby?
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
My ex is stopping by while he’s working tonight after delivering a pizza to fuck me, then going back to work at Pizza Hut. This is what my life has become.
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
Randomize
