when your friendship is based on dead babies and vodka there is a delicate balance. lesson learned. for what its worth, you are still my number one.
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
you know you made it when your beer pong table is made from imported italian hardwood
Just found a dugout in my rental car glove box. Suddenly my mood is upbeat.
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
I woke up and the only 2 bowls I own were shattered on my floor. Pretty sure my hand and tailbone are broken and I have no idea what the fuck happened
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
I'm batshit crazy. I don't know how you guys keep forgetting that
i can do like, 15 pushups. 20 if i listen to dubstep.
Nothing like walk of shaming to the bus stop in your bar clothes at noon and seeing the fire truck you work on drive past with the other shift giving you thumbs up.. Brotherhood at its finest
This couple is walking their pig around campus
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
Randomize
