So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
Whatever, she only has 293 friends, she cant afford to be defriending me..
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
You told the cop at mobil to keep it real and look both ways before crossing the street.
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
So, since you're now a four night stand, I feel comfortable asking: Did I leave my sunglasses at your house? Or my underwear?
If you get home and there is an older woman there, its my mom. She wants to come and see the place after work. Just an FYI. Not the older sluts I bang.
I am making up for a 7 year dry spell so I get a pass and I don't always care if there is a second date. It is like college but with more money and condoms.
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
So I fucked a guy with his mouth wired shut last night never thought id cross that off my imaginary bucket list
I mean, I let him sleep with me after we both ate taco bell sober... That's kinda like love, right?
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
You poured all their beer into ziploc baggies so it would be "better on the go"
Randomize
