you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
where are my pants?
you were passing out with two blankets and the person next to you was cold so you gave him your pants to keep warm
Yeah I'm buying him lunch right now because I shot him with the fire extinguisher last night
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
I just wanna go home eat some pizza rolls, get warm and jerk off, and it's only 845. This shit was supposed to make me see unicorns. Not cry
There are too many people on this bus for it to be even REMOTELY okay that I'm wearing a puke covered sweater
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
Hahahahahahhajahahahahajajjajahjahahajahahajajahahahajjajajahahjajajajajahahahajjjajajaahhahhahahahahahahahaha dominos taxi
Bathroom attendant appreciated that hug I have him as a tip. Fucking BROKE these days.
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
i decided if i had to, i could survive with only 3 fingers on each hand.
Nothing says I'm doing some sketchy shit like coming out of your bedroom with your underwear inside out
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