Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
turkey basters and jungle juice, is that really the whole shopping list for new year's?
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
Just remember my house smells of thick cut bacon and I have a big dick.
I praised you last night for winning a chug off...you thanked me with a ridiculously hard headbutt. Thanks dick.
I'm a bit broke right now... Would it be OK if I pay you in champagne and Xanax?
My mom said she saw you at the grocery store. Said you looked like you were "headed for a Lindsay Lohan quarter life crisis of sorts"
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
PS: bike ride of shame at 7am includes riding by kids waiting for the school bus #classy
i woke up to a text from someone I put in my phone last night as "Giant Penis"
what did G.P. say?
oddly enough it was a dick pic
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
You claimed that someone else had vomited underneath you/on your hand
you were very insulted that we didn’t believe you that someone else vommed
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
Randomize
