If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
he drank a monster margarita at dinner. had to ask me if it was dollars or minutes that ended in 60.
guess who has a date tonight
look at you growing up, going on dates before she hops into bed
You should have been there to see the look on her face when I told her that my dog gives better head than her. It was a beautiful symphony of shock, anger, and disbelief.
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
I just pictured ballsacks being shoveled into the furnace of the Titanic.
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
Note to self. The tub labelled "not water" does not contain water.
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
I'm gonna be the best dressed mother fucker to ever get kicked out of that damn bar.
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
After the first time we had sex he kept saying "I'm proud of you" over and over again
You know you're old when you’re masturbating and you pull your hip
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