If I die today, promise to let the world know I partied.... oh god did I party
Whats the glycemic index on semen?
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
I'm surrounded by 3 year olds in tutus. They are far too innocent to be within at least 500 ft of me.
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
The bottle I was drinking out of splintered on the bottom, there was glass in my hand, I pulled it out with my teeth... Not the best night for Drunk Kevin
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
It was your ex but it was not eighties night, it was pudding wrestling. And either thank you or I'm sorry depending on the state of my pants left on the doorstep
Are you alive?
I googled "I don't want to vomit anymore," and "how to rip out your uvula," at 9 am this morning, but I'm still here. Uvula and all.
If you hook up with a kid and the next day he breaks up with his girlfriend, those can be seen as two completely unrelated incidents right?!
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
I wish drunk me came with subtitles
You know you've been having sex for 9 months when you do Rock Paper Scissors for who has to go on top
You took acid last night and I’m up early to go to the grand opening of a new TJMaxx by my house. We couldn’t be more perfect.
Who put my cat in the fridge?
Randomize
