the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
Thats about the time I should have known you would run around naked and try to make out with my sleeping mother
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
I'm terrified to sleep next to her. Of course the sex will be fuckng awesome.
Her boyfriend only talks to me because I know her period schedule
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
and I'm sitting five inches from the tv scrunched up in a ball watching doug. It's like I'm five again...except I'm more stoned than the dude who created this show
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
Times like this, when you talk openly about Tinkerbell being your spirit animal, are times when I'm allowed to question your sexuality.
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
Next time, dont ever let me talk to a guy drunk, especially if I have class with him the next day
Who do you have class with??
The guy that pulled down his pants in the middle of the dance floor to show me his tattoo
I never thought it would be so hard to find a power hour partner at 2 on a Wednesday
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
Between randomly bursting into tears and the reappearance of my lost sex drive, this break up has left me bizarrely damp.
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
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