yeah so this exboyfriend of yours reckons you're still together and he punched me in the face cos i slept with you last week. you might wanna have a word with him or at a minimum change your facebook status.
My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
i found literally half of a double sided dildo in my shower. i guess someone went home happy.
just walked past a girl in her cap and gown puking her brains out beside a tree. her friends were taking pictures of her.
I'm concerned you might be passed out on a random rooftop right now. Not concerned enough to do anything about it. Hope you're alive. Goodnight.
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
First time for everything: started posting a Facebook comment, decided I'm not quite sober enough. Progress.
Do not tell guys at bars about kittens you rescue. They will walk away.
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
My father has a definite type: blonde, busty, 18-22. It was awkward when I was in college, but now I'm over it. I play wingman for him and he buys me expensive purses for the assistance in getting him hooked up with girls younger than me. Win-win.
A guy just threw up in my lecture of 500 ppl and just got up and walked away
Randomize
