Did you know that when you swallow it's like 60 calories!?
That's okay, it's all protein anyway.
do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
It's annoying. I only date people who are 6 foot 3, drug dealers, or 2 years older than me.
There is nothing more demoralizing than exchanging 150 dollar Christmas gifts with a girl your not sleeping with
Look, I'm just saying... paying ur respects to the neighbors who had a death in the family with food u steal from the neighbors having the cookout may result in a negative karma situation.
Turning 21 will be slightly bittersweet. Never again will I be able to get underage drunk at Disney World, now I'll only be able to get legal drunk and that just sets a whole different and sad tone for my life.
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
Ok despite the fact that both you and I love dick we could have a great marriage
No fair. I need a fuck buddy to entertain me till the power comes back on
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
Still drunk, heading to class.
It's 3 a.m. Dude
Doesn't mean I'm not at my desk. Ill wait.
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
Randomize
