You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
i woke up with someone drivers licenses in my wallet this am...he said i don't have a business card so just take my drivers license
they bought blue cups instead of red...wtf how am i supposed to pretend im on laguna beach??
it's like, God thought about making her pretty then changed his mind at the last second
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
I dunno if we should get high tonight man. its daylight savings. time travel is just too much for me right now.
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
I'd say it's a shame and a disservice to the world that we can't stay drunken shitshows to infinity
High gym went like this: I went to Dairy Queen instead.
Meet at Walmart straight from work to buy items for hurricane fun. Then blast some wine, make some sex, blast a bowl and cuddle each other till the sun comes up?
That's the most romantic New Orleans hurrication I've ever heard of. Can I have your babies?
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
I'm by myself. some Midwest chick is hitting on me because I gave her a deviled egg. I need the distraction.
I COULD CUT A FUCKING DIAMOND WITH MY RIGHT NIPPLE RIGHT NOW HOLY FUCK
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