Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
Until he has ordered mozzarella sticks & beers at 2pm while wearing formal attire, then this is still my bar.
Fell into a man hole last night. I've been bleeding since 11pm. Got kicked out of the bar for being bloody.
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
She was just a sweet cute intern for us until I saw her naked in my bed the day after the Christmas party
At one point 12 people dressed in care bear onesies were up on stage grinding super nasty, and two of the girl Care Bears were making out.
If this wasn't a hallucination, we need to go to this magical kingdom every night of the week.
We have a vagina exchange agreement. Neither of us can hook up with any of our own law firm's summer associates. So we have a scout and referral program and invite each other to the other firm's summer events. Criss-cross!! Works every summer.
I fell into the fireplace. That is a pretty good sign to stop drinking fireball
You got stoned and bought $300 worth of pudding. Again! Why do YOU think she left you?
Is it rude to send him a, "happy birthday, I hope you finally get an STD" text?
are you still up? I want to use you for sexual things. you have 35 minutes to respond to this offer.
last night I used snow as a chaser
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
Randomize
