do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
Sorry about the voicemail last night, people in hostel thought getting the clap from cheating on me wasn't enough and you hearing a 6 foot 5 Swedish dude bang the shit out of me was needed.
He's upstairs shouting 'FUCK OFF I'M IN MY MOTHERFUCKING ZEN ZONE' out of the window.
People dont know what to do when a naked fat guy is running towards them. they panic
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
So i had a feeling this dude with one leg in a wheelchair was following me around Walmart turns out I was right. He just asked for a picture of my feet.
i mean i let him but still...
Well waking up naked, covered in Chex mix is not how I planned to start my Wednesday if that's what you're getting at.
Could someone explain to me why there were 40 individually wrapped burritos in the fridge when I woke up this morning?
This girl was in the river screaming that someone didn't love her anymore...that's when the guy in a kilt claimed her...
Totally writing my paper on the toilet. Makes me miss you.
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
Randomize
